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What I learned from a spider.

Updated: Jul 15, 2023

Local coffee shops with a good vibe are often where I hang out for a change of scenery. There's the European boutique and coffee shop in the town I live in (my favorite), the one within walking distance to hotels and the largest mall in the world, and the one with yummy acai power bowls in the city. These are the places I accomplish tasks for my passion project outside of my day job.

These energetic establishments are where I do the things that I hope will help gain momentum toward my mission to help as many people as possible live as and be their authentic selves. I write blogs, send emails with updates to keep subscribers informed, work on my plan, and post to social media.

We all need to find our places. Places where we can melt into our surroundings, disappear from the day-to-day, escape the world, and focus on what's important to us. When I arrived to the coffee shop of choice last weekend, I ordered a veggie quiche and settled in for a while, ate my lunch, and tried to focus on doing my thing. It was a hot day and the air conditioning was blasting. I was freezing and decided to move outside. There was a lovely concrete patio that was under cover so the temperature was perfect for sitting outside on this hot, sunny day.

Among many things on my mind, writing a blog was one of them so I started typing away. I was having a difficult time focusing because my mindset was in scarcity mode. I felt in a rush and like I had a lot to accomplish in a short period of time. A family sat down at the table next to me. They had the cutest little dog with them and I was distracted. Having recently published my first book, I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed with all of the activities involved in marketing the book. As I was trying to write this exact blog, there was a little beige-colored spider, about the size of a blueberry (but flatter), crawling on the table toward me. I don't like spiders. It's nothing personal. They haven't done anything to me. They are just creepy and freak me out a little. Not so much this little guy though.

I took a piece of paper and brushed the spider off of the table and it fell onto the chair next to me. I tried to turn my attention back to my blog and next thing I knew, the spider was back on the table crawling toward me. This eight-legged creature was also a distraction. Again, I brushed it off the table and my fingers started tapping on the keyboard once again. A few sentences later, that little bugger was crawling on the edge of my laptop's screen. This time I was sure to sweep it off the table and away from the chairs. I saw it on the concrete about three feet from the table and thought I was done with this spider.

Relieved and thinking this spider and I finally would go our separate ways, I went back to the keyboard and started tapping away once again to make sense out of the sentences I was trying to form on the page. That persistent little spider was once again on the table making its way toward me, but for the last time. I closed my laptop and decided to leave and let the spider do it's thing. I was done for the day and without a completed blog. By this time, the whole idea of my blog - this blog - changed.

When I got in the car and started the engine, I couldn't stop thinking about that spider. Clearly, there was some meaning to this experience and I didn't want to miss the message. Even though I fear spiders, I knew the message wasn't about fear. Before shifting into drive, I decided to do some quick research to see what spiders symbolize. In a nutshell, I learned that spiders may symbolize patience and persistence. This resonated with me.

Just following the moments with my spider friend, I reflected and cleared my mind of the chaos when I took the time to search for a little meaning. I opened my mind and took a breath, practiced curiosity, and was receptive. It took two intentional minutes to feel enlightened, lighter, and energized. Patience and persistence was the right message and the one I needed to hear at that moment. It was a message I had received from others leading up to this this moment. For example, a life coach and friend said to me, "There is no rush. There is no timeline." My partner recently stated, "Why are you so stressed about this? This is your passion. Have some fun with it."

I am surround with insightful and caring people, but the spider is what made things click. Rather than focusing on what there is yet to do, I've decided to remind myself to recognize and celebrate the small things. Without persistence to achieve the small things every day, the large accomplishments are not possible. For example, I recently created my email signature for my part-time passion project. It might sound silly, but I'm proud that I took this action. Recognizing the small but mighty moments reduces scarcity thinking by shifting from what we haven't done yet to what we have. Think of how many tiny and seemingly insignificant things you accomplish everyday! It's momentous.

Being in a hurry has taken the fun out of things for me lately. Have you noticed this for yourself? I'm glad that little spider prompted me to pause, even for just a few minutes. My goal is to enjoy my unfinished life journey. Focusing on abundance and what you have accomplished, no matter how small, contributes to living with patience. Savor the moments. Rushing through life will make you miss them.

Try This

What's your hurry? Are you feeling inpatient? Are you feeling like you're not doing enough? Can't keep up? Is your career not moving fast enough? How about your relationship? Do you feel like others are ahead of you in life, at work, or in the community? Are you feeling impatient? Here are some tips to exercise an abundance mindset and patience.

  • The truth is that you are on your our own unique life journey and it doesn't have to look like anyone else's. It can be at your pace. It can be your way. You do You!

  • Recognize every single small but mighty moment of accomplishment throughout the course of one day. I mean every single one. Write them all down. You'll be surprised how quickly you might shift your mindset from scarcity to abundance.

  • Pause to engage with all of your senses. Listen to your intuition and find the meaning. Open your mind, take a breath, practice curiosity, and be receptive.


If this blog resonates with you and you'd like to read more, subscribe to my website and blogs. If there is someone you know who might benefit, pass it along.

I'm on a mission to help as many people as possible be and live as their authentic selves, which is the ticket to fulfillment, happiness, and possibilities. After fifteen years of thinking about writing a book, I finally wrote Unfinished: Unlock Your Superpowers, Live with Purpose, and Discover Unlimited Possibilities.


To learn more about Unfinished listen to these recent podcasts where I had the opportunity to talk about the book and mission with Phil Gerbyshak and Dr. Deborah Lukovich.

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